Diary of a Happy Goth

Rebounds are just that: rebounds

If you’ve become emotionally attached to your rebounds, it’s a sign that you aren’t ready. It’s all based on fantasy and romanticism, not reality. It comes from your need to feel desired and wanted like you were in the relationship. The person isn’t the love of your life or brought by the universe to save you. You’re trying to fill a void and distract yourself. Starting brutal! 

Radical self acceptance

Instead of thinking about self-love, try radical self acceptance. You need to accept your negative traits and give yourself grace for having them, which will eliminate shame and self-judgement. I am now growing to accept and love my weaknesses instead of shying away from them.

Body vs mind

Sometimes the body reacts differently to the mind, or begins processing things before you actually do. After my break-up I thought I was thriving, being a social butterfly and carrying on with everything. But I lost my appetite completely and started having (luckily mild) more frequent eczema flare-ups. I now know it was my body’s way of warning me that a period of bad mental health was arriving, but I ignored it. Listen to your body, it is always telling you things!

Self-belief will save you

When you’re in it, everything feels impossible and hopeless. But a lot of that is exacerbated by anxiety and spiralling. I thought it would be impossible to submit my final essays and do well in them, because I found myself not caring about anything. I didn’t care what my result was and just wanted to get them done. I ended up doing well and getting some scores I’m really proud of, which surprised me but at the same time reassured me that I am capable of so much more than my struggling brain had me believing.